After your child is born, it is easy to want to rush their milestones. You are eager for them to begin rolling over, crawling, talking, and walking. However, sometime around the first day of preschool or kindergarten, we start wishing we could turn back the clock. Once it is clear they will not be little forever; we want them to hold onto their childhood as long as possible.
Alas, we can’t stop them from growing up. Whether we want to think about it or not, our first and second graders will be sixth and seventh graders before we know it.
Even though you may feel like you want to delay the preteen years, it is important to prepare your elementary-aged students for their middle school years. This article will help you navigate the keys to ensuring your kids are ready for grades six through eight.
Develop Open Lines of Communication
If your child is in kindergarten, first, or second grade, it might feel like communication will always be open. You may think you’ll never have to wonder what they are thinking or how they are feeling.
As they get older, your little chatterbox could surprise you with how quiet they become. When it is time to help them get ready for the challenging preteen years, you need to access their thoughts and emotions, so it is vital to do everything you can to establish open lines of communication. Here are a few tips for talking to your children
How to Keep Communicating With Your Elementary-Aged Children
- Ask the Right Questions: Ask questions that help get your child talking. Ask them how they are feeling about school, what they like and dislike about certain subjects, and what they think helps them learn best. You might be surprised by their answers.
- Demonstrate You Are Listening: Your kids might shut down if they don’t believe you’re listening. Demonstrate that what they say is important to you. Make sure you put your phone away while they are speaking. Repeat back what they say to you. Make eye contact while they answer your questions and express their emotions.
- Express Your Own Fears and Doubts: You are your child’s hero. They look to you for inspiration and strength. Parents may tend to shy away from admitting they deal with their own fear and doubts. However, you can connect with your child by sharing stories of times you were nervous about doing new things and how you overcame concerns with courage.
- Talk Even When You’re Not Sure They Are Listening: Sometimes, even when asking the right questions and doing your best to listen well, you may find your child does not seem engaged. In those situations, you may need to do your share of talking, even if it does not seem like they’re listening. They may be retaining a lot more than you realize.
By the time they reach their preteen years, you want to make sure they are comfortable communicating with you. Establishing this foundation while they are still young is key.
Establish Effective Study Habits
Do you remember the show, Are You Smarter than a 5th Grader? That show proved that schoolwork gets challenging for parents earlier than we might have otherwise believed.
It’s not getting any easier for your children either. It is important to establish effective study habits early, so they are not taken off guard by the increased difficulty of the curriculum in sixth grade.
We wrote in more detail about how parents can help their elementary-aged students study here. A few of our tips include:
- Get Organized: If you find yourself frequently repeating commands such as, “Clean your room,” you will need to step in and help your elementary student develop organization skills prior to starting sixth grade.
- Use a Calendar: It will not suffice to just remind them to study. You will be required to participate in the prioritization of what to study and when. This will likely involve establishing physical and cloud-based calendars for studying and assignments.
- Talk to Your Teachers: Your child’s teachers are experts in studying. They will have the best advice regarding study habits.
- Use Your Child’s Strengths: Pay close attention to the ways in which your child learns most effectively. Use their strengths to help them master challenging subjects.
- Evaluate and Reevaluate: Every child is different. You may find that to be true even among siblings. Use their elementary school years to evaluate and reevaluate techniques and methods. By the time they reach sixth grade, they will be ready to study well.
Effective study habits work best in conjunction with health and wellness. Here is how to help your child stay healthy mentally and physically:
- The battle for health and wellness begins on Sunday.
- Gather with your church on Sundays, and make sure you take time to rest.
- Make sure your kids go to bed at a reasonable time on Sunday evenings. Establish a healthy bedtime routine. Turn off screens an hour or more before bed.
- Wake everyone up in plenty of time for school
- Have children eat a healthy breakfast.
- Make sure your children have access to a healthy lunch.
- When at home, have them take study breaks every hour.
- Make sure they spend plenty of time outdoors.
These healthy-living habits will help your child be more focused in school and at home.
Address Anxiety
You never want to think there is something wrong with your child. It is easy, therefore, to write off the symptoms of anxiety as a case of nerves. Some of the signs your student may be dealing with anxiety include:
- Frequently complaining of headaches and stomach aches
- Changes in their diet or lack of appetite
- Difficulty communicating their concerns
- Angry outbursts
- Unusually high hyperactivity
- Frequently crying
- Lethargy and fatigue
- Panic attacks
- Nightmares
If your child has anxiety or a bad case of nerves regarding the transition from fifth to sixth grades, here are a few things you can do to help:
- Speak to your child’s teachers about whether they see signs of anxiety.
- Ask your child’s pediatrician or a mental health professional about steps to take.
- Make sure your child has all the materials and information they need for success.
- Help your child take frequent breaks from studying to spend time outside.
- Spend time together as a family.
- Listen to your child’s concerns.
- Make sure your child has healthy sleeping, eating, and exercise habits.
- Establish your home as a place of peace.
If you suspect your elementary-aged child is struggling with anxiety, reach out to our team here at St. Paul Lutheran School for help and resources.
Tips for Surviving and Thriving in Sixth Through Eighth Grades
With lines of communication open, effective study habits established, and anxiety addressed, your child will have a strong foundation on which to build heading into their preteen years. Now, here are seven tips to help your child survive and thrive as they exit the elementary school years.
1) Learn Respect and Humility: If your child is respectful of their peers, teachers, and administrators, they will find that people are respectful of them as well. Opportunities will open up for your child when they demonstrate they care for others.
2) Stand on the Gospel: Your child may struggle with feeling like they measure up to the demands of academics and life in general. Believing in the gospel and preaching it to ourselves is how we remember that Jesus did what we could not by upholding God’s standard for us and sacrificing his life to make sure we measure up.
3) Daily Prayer and Bible Study: It is challenging even for adults to maintain daily devotional time. If you can help your elementary-aged student establish daily Bible study and prayer habits, it can carry on through middle school and beyond.
4) Learn to Be Courageous: Your child will grow and change daily through their preteen years. Grades six through eight will present opportunities to try new activities and stretch their intellects. Help them learn to be courageous and embrace new challenges.
5) Give Them Freedom: You have been teaching them how to be adults since they were little. As your children approach their preteen and teenage years, lengthen the least and allow some measured freedom. It is the right time to let them practice what you have preached.
6) Encourage Extracurriculars: The middle school years are typically when they can begin participating in athletics, fine arts, and extracurricular clubs. Even if your child is nervous about trying new things, encourage them to try extracurricular activities. They may find something about which they will be passionate beyond the eighth grade.
7) Choose a Christian School: If you want to make sure your child has a solid support system throughout their preteen years, choose a Christian school for kindergarten through eighth grade. Even if your child is already beyond kindergarten, they will still benefit from the strength of support you will gain from Christian administrators and teachers.
If your child is in elementary school and approaching middle school, we would love to answer your questions about how they can thrive here at St. Paul Lutheran School in Northville, Michigan.
We have over sixty years of experience helping children grow into the men and women God created them to be. Our teachers are mentors who help guide students to follow Jesus while providing the highest quality academic experience.
Contact our office for more information about how your child can be part of St. Paul.